ABC's and Compassion 101

Harry has finished his second week of pre-K and is really enjoying it. I was a little nervous about putting him in for 4 mornings a week. I got some kick back from him last year for his two mornings a week of school, so I was afraid that would happen again (times 2). SO FAR, I have only had to encourage him to have a good attitude one morning these last two weeks. He seems to really be blossoming under the higher expectations and learning load of this pre-K program. His classroom is really focused on kindergarten readiness (Ohio has a long list of things kids are encouraged to know before entering kindergarten), so they do a fair amount of school work each day. His writing has greatly improved--I can almost read his name! Each week they focus on a letter and he comes home every day full of new information.

One thing that really encourages my heart is seeing him grow in empathy and compassion for others. I've seen him try to reach out to others that feel shy or lonely--one boy in particular in his classroom. Along those lines, I've also seen him show empathy and kindness to Hannah when she has come home after a rough day at school. She has a couple of mean girls in her classroom and she has a tendency to be sensitive to the way they treat her--the apple didn't fall far from the tree with this girl! :) I pointed out to Harry that she was having a little bit of a hard time at school and his immediate reaction was to run to her and say, "Hannah, I'm sad that you are sad and I want to give you hugs and kisses. Will you come and play with me?". He's not subtle, but he sure is sweet.

It is these little glimpses that help settle my heart in the path that we are following. I had a hard time in junior high with my first experience of public school. I felt like the odd man out a lot and experienced a fair amount of teasing (although I think almost everyone does in middle school). Hannah had a hard week at school last week. There is one girl (we'll call her "F") who is "popular" and the ring leader of the "mean girls" and she is choosing to be unkind to my little Hannah. This is so hard to navigate through--hard for me to guide Hannah in kindness when I just want to go to school and kick some first grader butt. Last week I was ready to pull her out and start homeschooling. I had to keep reminding myself that we PRAYED about this for FOREVER and this is where we feel like God has led us to be. There will be sacrifices as we walk in obedience. I have to fight against my mama bear mentality and realize that my responsibility is to teach her how to deal with unkindness, not protect her from ever experiencing it. We talked a lot about persisting in love towards "F" while also seeking out other friends who might need some kindness themselves.

I saw two things happen in Hannah's and my heart this week. First, I saw God soften my heart towards "F". I volunteered in Hannah's room (which I will start doing on a regular basis) and saw some things that made my heart move towards compassion. "F" is from a lower income family and has some insecurities herself--she seemed to really need attention from all of the adults in the room, almost seemed to crave it, which makes me wonder how much she gets at home. The second movement towards compassion that I saw was in Hannah, and it looked very different from what I thought it would look like. Hannah was finally included in "F"'s "group", but noticed that she then turned on another child, calling her "stupid" and telling her that she was not aloud to play with them. Hannah, who is my timid child, stood up for this other girl, telling "F" that it was wrong of her to speak in this way. Hannah then left the group (that she has been wanting to be a part of since the beginning of school) and asked the ousted little girl to play with her. All of this growth would not have happened if I had intervened and separated them, like I was tempted to do. Hannah now sees for herself that this is a group that she does not want to be a part of and these are not girls she wants to emulate.

God's way is always the best way. I'm going to have to come back and read this post the next time I need to attend Compassion 101. I can trust the Teacher to always know what is best and to guide and direct us on the path that He has laid out for us to walk. It will not always be an easy road to follow, but it is guaranteed to make us more like Christ--which is the definition of true happiness.